Still Dating

You may recall, we recently began looking for a new furry friend and after looking at online adoption notices, we went on our first doggy date with a potential candidate. The meet and greet went well enough. We liked the dog and she was very affectionate, but that seemed to be her personality rather than an indication of her preference for us, because she eagerly greeted everyone nearby with the same initial tail wagging enthusiasm, but then her ears would perk up and she’d stand tall looking off in the distance, as though waiting for someone in particular.

While we all found her cute and sweet, I didn’t intuitively feel that connection I felt when we first met Winston. It was all very cordial, but her doggy dance card was filled with other potential suitors and by the end of the week, she went home with a different family. It’s just as well because after that week, life sped up and it wouldn’t have been a good time to introduce a new pet into our household. I’m still perusing the adoption sites, but thinking June may be a better time.

The whole process reminds me of this terrific take on dating personal ads - (remember those?) - as depicted in this genius free postcard -(remember those?) advertising scheme for SPCALA, circa 1990s.

Remember these free postcards in bars and restaurants?

Recently there have been a slew of a dog adoption videos online, where the dogs choose their humans. The first video I saw looked plausible and I legitimately wiped some tears, but when I went back to find it, I couldn’t locate it. Instead, the videos I found all seemed really off— for example: They all had similar cheesy graphics and showed people hugging dogs and crying. One video started with a room full of small breed, well-behaved, pure bred dogs, who were all calmly sitting together waiting to enter the adoption area. C’mon; no one would have given these dogs up for adoption! These were followed by a debunking video¹ which showed how these were AI slop and pointed out how figures and objects were disfigured. (Video attached below).

I guess I fell for it because I did have a legitimate experience when I was a teen and bought a pet parrot from a small mom & pop pet store in Lemon Grove, San Diego. The store policy was that the bird would choose you. (It was similar to going to an aviary where you’re permitted to feed nectar to the lorikeets.)

Feeding a Lorikeet at the Aquarium of the Pacific

I remember stepping into the pet store aviary and having dozens of parrots flying about. I found it delightful, but some might have found it nerve-wracking. Every once in a while a bird would fly over and land on my arm, give me a quick look over and then fly off. Eventually, one bird landed on me and walked up my arm to my shoulder and stayed by my side. It was a perfect match. I named him Napoleon because I had seen an SNL short where there were parrots wearing costumes and a similar breed of parrot was dressed like Bonaparte.

With my beloved grey cheek, Napoleon.

Napoleon was my beloved companion for about seven years till he died of a rare blood disorder. When he passed, it was on Christmas night around midnight and he died in my dear friend, Chili’s hands, while I was desperately calling the animal emergency hospital trying to get help. We both wept uncontrollably. I didn’t get another pet till after college.

How heartbreaking it is to lose our animal companions. I still weep over the loss of Winston, at times. Our pets teach us so much about love and compassion and kinship with other living beings. I remember once meeting a psychic and he said that there was a menagerie with him, wanting to greet me. That sounds about right. Over the course of my life I have had many animal companions. Aside from when I was in college, I have always had pets. It feels strange to not have that animal energy in our household right now.

All of my pets have had such distinctive personalities and have become members of the family. So it’s only right that the adoption decision feels mutual—that a match be felt with the heart— because ideally this will be a long loving relationship. So for now, our search continues. I’ll let you know when we make a match.

Xoj

PS) Hope you enjoyed the story. As always, I’m grateful to have you here. Thanks for reading! If you enjoy my stories, I invite you to consider a paid subscription or giving a tip. Kindly leave a comment below and restack!

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